Step 4: Take a moment to understand self – love vs self – care and take action accordingly.
Our culture has made Self-Love and Self-Care hot button words that people grab hold of, twist, and make their own. There are heavy debates in Christian circles about how we are to approach these topics and what we should or should not do in these areas.
But what does God say we are to do with self-love?
One of the hardest realizations I faced when I was down from my accident is that I had no self-love. In fact, I was punishing myself more often than not thinking it was what a “good Christian” would do.
I had moments where I resented that I couldn’t do anything and then if I did briefly go out (even though I was in immense pain) I would feel guilty that I had a moment of peace.
I had guilt and shame, but I had no self-love.
The fact is, if you’re taking time for yourself and applying “self-care” techniques to your life and you’re STILL unhappy, then this isn’t a self-care issue. If you are not willing to let God address the depths of your brokenness, the rest won’t help you get unstuck from where you are.
You can’t medicate your pain with validation from other people or mommy day spa days alone. All that does is just leave you empty IF (and it’s a BIG IF) that’s ALL you do to escape the prison of your life.
Don’t misunderstand me, mama’s need some time away and to feel appreciated. But it’s important to pay attention. If you’re receiving those things and nothing is changing for you on the inside, then you have no self-love. And there are massive consequences to existing like this; in our relationship with the Lord, our marriage, or with our kids who look up to us daily.
The negative effects are intense. Comparison, shame, guilt, anxiety, and fear to name a few. They are not from God and can have a terribly negative influence on what we tell ourselves and, subsequently, how we treat ourselves.
So how are we to operate from a place of peace, contentment, and overflow if we are not tending to our cup? How can God use us as the vessel that He intends if we are not filled?
We need to have excess love to be able to pour out that love into the world.
Jesus said that we need to love our neighbors AS MUCH AS we love ourselves. You MUST love yourself if you have any hope of being effective at self-care.
This lesson on Self-love comes from God himself. God is Love. Read 1 John 4:7-21.
If we don’t love ourselves, and are talking down to ourselves all of the time, we are in disagreement with God.
Instead, it’s time to fill our minds with thoughts of who God says we are and His promises. When we start to see God for who He really is, we can see ourselves for who we actually are.Take a moment to think about God’s love for you. Allow yourself to feel His love for you and realize that you can love you too…. today… right, where you are at! Click To Tweet
Oh and remember the lesson from Day 2? Choices? You have to make that CHOICE to listen to and believe how God loves you according to His word… even if you don’t feel like it 🙂
PS: If you need some help learning how to make the CHOICE to love yourself, right where you are at… I am here to help! Sign up for the Study Nook Insiders Program and get affordable 1-on-1 coaching & mentorship to help you be the best YOU.
Catch up on the other challenge days
- Day 1: Take an honest look at your IDENTITY
- Day 2: Make a CHOICE
- Day 3: It’s time to get quiet and LISTEN
- Day 5: Evaluate your PRIORITIES